Lesson

Spiritual Health

 

People Pleasing

This topic is something I am super passionate about because I have seen how trying to please others keeps so many people from really living. I have many struggles when it comes to living like Jesus, but God has truly set me free from worrying about what people think of me. Most nights when I put my head on my pillow, I don’t think about how people felt about what I did, but I do hope and pray that I lived the way God had planned for me.

 

I find some of the most life-changing verses are:

 

Galatians 1:10: “Obviously, I'm not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ's servant.”

 

Proverbs 29:25: “The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is safe.”

 

1 Thessalonians 2:4: “Our purpose is to please God, not people. He alone examines the motives of our hearts.”

 

In his book, “The Life You’ve Always Wanted,” John Ortberg calls those who live for the approval of man “approval addicts.” He explains how you can know if you suffer from this very common condition:

 

“If we find ourselves often getting hurt by what others say about us, by people expressing other than glowing opinions about us, we probably have it. If we habitually compare ourselves with other people, if we find ourselves getting competitive in the most ordinary situations, we probably have it. If we live with a nagging sense that we aren't important enough or special enough or we get envious of another's success, we probably have it. If we keep trying to impress important people, we probably have it. If we are worried that someone might think ill of us should he or she find out we are an approval addict, we probably have it.”

 

John goes on to quote Henri Nouwen, who helps put this problem into perspective: “At issue here is the question: ‘To whom do I belong? To God or to the world?’ Many of my daily preoccupations suggest that I belong more to the world than to God. A little criticism makes me angry, and a little rejection makes me depressed. A little praise raises my spirits and a little success excites me. Often I am like a small boat on the ocean, completely at the mercy of its waves.”

 

There are many problems with being an approval addict:

 

You will never win. Everyone has their own opinions, and often the opinions don’t match up. One person will say you are too pushy with your faith, while another says you need to be bolder. Some will say you work too hard, while others think you need to push a bit harder. Some say you exercise too much, while others say you don’t exercise enough. Trying to gain approval from everyone will lead you on a no-win journey.

 

Joy, peace, and contentment elude you. You probably have moments of happiness, but the “joy always” that you read about in the Bible can’t be found. When others praise you, you may be at peace, but it doesn’t last. When you hear that someone else is receiving praise that you felt you deserved, the contentment you felt is pulled away. Because you can’t make everyone happy, you will always struggle with lasting joy, peace, and contentment.

 

Constant, simmering fear is always near. Most approval addictions are caused by fear. We fear what others think of us and we allow that fear to drive our behavior. When we behave a certain wa,y we are looking around to see how others react. Will they approve of what I did? What if they don’t? This fear keeps us from really living. The only way to break free from this fear is to fully trust God and to turn to Him alone for direction and approval.

 

We can’t be “zealous” if we seek man’s approval. So, I just have to share this with you. I am writing this as I sit on a plane with my 19-year-old son, Neal, next to me. I just leaned over and asked him to read what I was writing and tell me what else he thought I needed to include. After reading this, he immediately thumbed through the book he was reading, found a certain page, and said, “You need to dig deeper into the ‘pleasing God’ part of this. It’s called being zealous.” He handed me the book and as I read, I knew this was what I needed to share with you. The word “zealous” often gets a bad rap, but when it comes to God, we should be “zealous.” Here is what I read in his book.

 

“Zeal in Christianity is a burning desire to please God, to do His will, and to advance His glory in the world in every possible way. A zealous person in Christianity is preeminently a person of one thing. They only see one thing, they care for one thing, they live for one thing, and they are swallowed up in one thing; that one thing is to please God. Whether they live, or whether they die, whether they are healthy, or whether they are sick, whether they are rich, or whether they are poor or whether they please man, or whether they give offense or whether they are thought wise, or whether they are thought foolish or whether they are accused, or whether they are praised or whether they get honor, or whether they get shame-for all this the zealous person cares nothing at all.” (Practical Religion, J. C. Ryle)

 

I know some of you might be thinking, “Well, that’s a bit extreme.” But is it? Is it extreme to turn to God for direction and approval over man? The word “Christian” means someone who is a follower of Christ. If you are a Christian, then you are to look at the way Jesus lived and try to follow His lead. Jesus was not concerned with what others thought of Him. He definitely wasn’t concerned with trying to please the Pharisees. He knew His purpose was to please God. In John 6:38 Jesus says, “For I have come down from heaven to do the will of God who sent me, not to do my own will.” Then, in John 8:29 we hear, “The one who sent me is with me; he has not left me alone, for I always do what pleases him.”

 

When you break free from approval addiction and truly value God’s opinions over man’s, your life may take a drastic turn. I want to go back to what I read in the book Neal shared with me because I love how J. C. Ryle explains the benefits of being a zealous Christian. Remember that the word “zeal” means a burning desire to please God. Ryle explains:

 

Zeal is good for the soul of a Christian.

 

It is certain that God never gave men and women a commandment that was not in their interest to obey. He never gave a teaching to His believing people that His people will not find their highest happiness in following after. This is true of all the instructions about the Christian character. Perhaps it is preeminently true in the case of zeal.

 

We all know that exercise is good for health and that regular exercise of our muscles and limbs promotes our bodily comfort and increases bodily strength. No one has so much enjoyment of Christ as those who are always zealous for His glory, watchful over their own walk, sensitive to their own consciences, full of concern about the souls of others, and always watching, working, laboring, and striving to expand the knowledge of Jesus Christ on earth. They honor God, and therefore God honors them.

 

No one has such joy and peace in believing - no one has such tangible contentment in their Christianity - no one has so much of heaven on earth - no one sees and feels so much of the compassion of the Gospel as those who are zealous, serious, devoted Christians.

 

Zeal is good for the Church.

Nothing is so effective in keeping true Christianity alive as the yeast of zealous Christians scattered throughout the Church. Like salt, they prevent the whole body from falling into a state of decay. There is a sense in which it may be said that zeal is contagious. Nothing is more useful to those who profess to be Christians than to see a real live Christian, a thoroughly zealous man of God. It may be a sad truth that one sinner destroys many good people, but it is also a blessed truth that one zealous Christian can do a lot of good. Yes: one single zealous man in a town, one zealous man in a congregation, one zealous man in a society, one zealous man in a family, may be a great blessing. Truly there is a deep mine of truth in those words of the Apostle Paul to the Corinthians: “Your enthusiasm has stirred most of them to action.” (2 Corinthians 9:2).

 

Zeal is good for the world.

But, just as zeal is good for the Church and for individuals, so zeal is also good for the world.

 

Where would the Missionary work be if it were not for zeal? Where would our evangelistic outreach program be without zeal? Without zeal, who would be willing to go and root out sin and ignorance, and find the dark places of the earth, and recover poor lost souls? Where would all these glorious instruments for good be if it were not for Christian zeal? Zeal called many of these institutions into being, and zeal keeps them at work when they have begun. Zeal gathers a few despised men and makes them the nucleus of many a powerful ministry.

 

Zeal does not stand meditating over difficulties, but simply says, “Here are some souls that are perishing, and we will do something.” Zeal does not shrink back because the enemy is standing in the way: it looks over their heads. Zeal does not wait for reinforcements and delay until good works are fashionable: it goes forward like one who is deserted and trusts that others will follow eventually. Yes, the world knows very little what a debt it owes to Christian zeal.

 

There is little danger of there ever being too much zeal for the glory of God.

 

Depend on it, the Church seldom needs a bridle, but often needs a spur. It seldom needs to be restrained; it often needs to be urged on.

 

I ask you, then, with all love, where is your zeal in Christianity? It is not that you don't know what it is to be zealous. You have zeal, but it is all misapplied. Surely it is good to labor for rewards that are temporal, but it is a thousand times better to labor for those that are eternal.”

 

As J. C. Ryle concludes his powerful article, he shares how our desire to please others keeps us from living a zealous Christian life. “Do not fear the reproach of men. If you are only zealous when you receive praise for it - if the wheels of your zeal must be oiled by the world’s commendation, your zeal will be short-lived. Do not care for the praise or the frown of man. There is only one thing worth caring for, and that is the praise of God.”

 

I’ve often heard people say that we actually do need to be concerned about what people think of us. I would disagree. I think we are called to care deeply for people, but we do not need to care what they think of us.

 

God asks us to love others, but loving others doesn’t mean we seek their approval or live to please them. The best way for me to love others is by obeying God’s Word and living with a zealous faith. Scriptures tell us to forgive, serve, share, pray for our enemies, and give to those in need. We shouldn’t do these things so others will approve of our actions; we should do these things because this is what God asks of us. We need to get to such a place of trust that we know that if we live solely for God, our lives will be so much more blessed.

   

Physical Health

 

The Fat Dilemma

 

It's true that many people are eating more fat than they need to, as well as eating too much of the wrong type of fat. However, your body does need fat to function properly. In fact, about 30% of the calories you take in should come from fat.

 

What does fat do for your body?

 

• Fat is needed so your body can absorb the fat-soluble vitamins A, D, E, and K.
• Fat helps food stay in your stomach longer, giving a greater sense of satisfaction and preventing hunger soon after meals. Diets too low in fat (less than 20-25%) may trigger cravings.
• Fat provides backup energy if blood sugar supplies run out (after 4-6 hours without food).
• Fat provides insulation under the skin to protect your body from the cold and heat.
• Fat protects your organs and bones from shock and provides support for your organs.
• Fat surrounds and insulates nerve fibers that help transmit nerve impulses.
• Fat is part of every cell membrane and helps transport nutrients across those membranes.
• Fat is a building block needed for everything from hormones to immune function.
• Fat is needed to prevent essential fatty acid deficiency.

 

We harm our bodies when we don’t eat enough fat, but we also harm our bodies when we eat too much of the wrong kind of fat.

 

Fat is not the enemy - added sugar is.

 

It seems like information is always changing when it comes to fat. “Don’t eat fat. Always get low-fat products. Avoid saturated fats. Fats are making us fat. Fats aren’t making us fat….” How do we know what’s truth is, and how do we determine what we should and shouldn’t eat?

 

From all my research, I feel the first thing we need to do is learn the difference between the three main types of fat.

 

Types of Fat:

There are three main types of dietary fats: saturated, unsaturated, and trans fats.

 

Saturated fats are usually solid at room temperature. They're found in animal-based foods such as red meat, poultry, and full-fat dairy. Coconut and palm oil are also high in saturated fat.

 

Unsaturated fats are typically soft or liquid at room temperature.

 

Fish and certain vegetables are high in unsaturated fats. There are two types of unsaturated fats: monounsaturated fats (olive, peanut, and canola oils; avocados; almonds, pecans, pumpkin, and sesame seeds; etc.) and polyunsaturated fats (fish and seafood; sunflower, safflower, corn, soybean, and flaxseed oils; walnuts and flaxseeds).

 

Finally, there are trans fats. Industrially-produced trans fats are the worst type of fat. Trans fats are made by adding hydrogen to vegetable oil. This process, called hydrogenation, makes a liquid oil into a solid. If you see partially hydrogenated vegetable oils, shortening, or margarine listed in the ingredients of any food, think twice before eating it because it contains trans fat.

 

Thankfully, the government has put restrictions on the use of trans fat, but we still need to use caution when shopping. A product can list 0 grams of trans fat and actually still have trans fat in it. This happens because food manufacturers are allowed to list “0 grams” on the label if the product contains less than 0.5 grams per serving. Although 0.5 grams might sound harmless, you may actually be increasing your risk of heart disease when you eat these products.

 

Some manufacturers have made their serving sizes so small that when we sit and eat packaged crackers, cookies, or other products that have partially hydrogenated oil in them, we could actually be ingesting more than 0.5 grams of trans fat. A couple of handfuls of crackers, a few boxed cookies, and you could take in 2 grams of trans fat. If you consistently eat these products, you are putting your health at risk.

 

Trans fats are typically found in frozen pizzas, pies, margarine, crackers, boxed cookies, ready-made frosting, coffee creamers, some fried foods, and other snacks (such as microwave popcorn).

 

Here is my recommendation when it comes to fat:

• Trans fat: Avoid
• Saturated fat: Somewhat Limit
• Unsaturated fat: Enjoy!! (Unsaturated fats are the healthiest of the fats, but they are high in calories so if you are watching your weight, you’ll need to be mindful of your fat intake)
• Let me show you what this looks like in your day-to-day eating:
• Margarine (trans fat): Avoid
• Butter (saturated fat): Somewhat Limit
• Olive Oil (unsaturated fat): Enjoy
• Pizza with trans fat: Avoid
• Hamburger: Somewhat Limit
• Salmon: Enjoy

 

You’ve probably heard a lot of talk about coconut oil. Even though it is a saturated fat, it is said to be a healthy fat. I know this may seem contradictory, but studies point to coconut oil’s many health benefits. It adds a great taste to a variety of foods. When I’m making a stir fry, I love to use coconut oil to give the dish a somewhat Asian flavor (it’s especially great with Thai recipes). It does have 120 calories per tablespoon, though, so don’t overindulge.

 

One last point: don’t think that something is healthy just because it claims to be “low-fat.” In the 1980’s we were told to limit our fat intake, so the grocery store shelves were loaded with “low-fat” foods. Food manufacturers knew they needed their low-fat products to taste good, so many of them replaced the fat with sugar and other fillers. This actually made the products more unhealthy.

 

When deciding if you should buy something, remember to look at the ingredients list. Unhealthy ingredients can not produce healthy food, even if the packaging claims it’s healthy.

 

If you want to eat healthy, you need to continue to educate yourself on what a healthy diet really looks like. There’s so much information out there, and I know it can be a bit overwhelming. Let’s take a minute to review some of what you’ve learned over the last few weeks.

 

• God created you. God created food. Eat what God created in its most natural state.
• Cut back on sugar. Limit your added sugar to less than 24 grams (6 teaspoons).
• Drink water to stay hydrated.
• Don’t go on any more diets
• Eat a healthy breakfast.
• Eat mainly unsaturated fats, limit your saturated fats and completely
• Avoid trans fats.

 

Inspirational Story #5: Christine

  I honestly believe that God used Faithful Workouts as one of the turning points in my walk with Him.  

For years, I struggled with body image issues, obsessing over the latest exercise and diet craze and putting all my efforts into achieving a certain "look". Naturally, this left me feeling empty, and I cried out to the Lord many times regarding this issue, but I always went back to my old ways. Around the time I sought the Lord again regarding this matter, I heard about Faithful Workouts and decided to give it a try.

 

It was through the awesome workouts with encouraging music and scripture, the workbooks that helped me stay focused on God's relationship in my life, health, and fitness, and the simple yet delicious recipes and encouraging scriptural text messages, that my focus began to change from trying to attain a certain jean size to getting fit to serve Him. It is truly a freedom I can't ever remember having or even fully express, and I owe it all to Michelle's faithfulness in allowing God to use her to reach people who need Him!

 

Fitness was an idol in my life, and now that it has been removed as such and put in proper perspective, my prayer life and scripture have come alive to me like never before. It has really impacted my walk with God, and I can't fully express my thankfulness. Now, exercise is a tool to keep me healthy to serve God, and that's the way it should be!

~Christine